According to her, it was because she herself was far too beautiful, she feared that I would be infatuated by her beauty, resulting in multiple symptoms such as being lost in thought or being unable to sleep at night; in severe cases, she even feared I might choose to break up with my Boyfriend, which is why she rejected me.
Me??
Okay, I can basically be certain she is talking nonsense.
————————————————————————
February 5 [unknown], Weather: Light rain
..
That cake was made by Amuro Tooru, damn it!
Why did he make it so delicious? QAQ
If things keep going like this, how am I ever going to lose weight?!
Forget it, I need to be full to have the strength to lose weight.. So, I very decisively bought another piece of cake.
This time, the cake is a Mille Crêpe Cake, but the cream and egg crepes are all handmade. The milk flavor is silky smooth and the crepes are rich; it is neither too greasy nor lacking in sweetness. Paired with various refreshing fruit slices, it forms a perfectly balanced, sweet, fragrant delight.
Tsk.
Tsk.
Tsk.
So delicious.
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February 15 [unknown], Weather: Light rain (with signs of tearing)
..
I don't care, I don't care, I don't care!
I want Yaji to kiss me, hug me, lift me up high!
Hmph!
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February 16, 20xx, Weather: Sunny
..
Seriously.. seriously, yesterday was a bit embarrassing QAQ
I was just drunk, really, just drunk!
Really, I definitely can't drink too much in the future, definitely!
Wait.. can I just tear out yesterday's diary page? Can I?!
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February 16, 20xx, Weather: Sunny
..
Forget it, I won't expose him after all.
After all, even a dark past is still history.
Maybe it could even become an interesting memory in the future, something that makes you smile to yourself when you think about it, as you tease yourself by saying, "Ah, so you had embarrassing moments like that too, huh?"
Thinking about it this way, even a dark past doesn't seem so embarrassing anymore.
QAQ
However, it was still very depressing!
Even though I have reasoned it out logically and know that this isn't something to make a huge fuss about, the emotional sense of unwillingness isn't something that can be brushed aside with just a few words!
Heartbroken.
No, it wasn't just heartache; it felt as if my entire heart was shattering into pieces!
I must have been drinking Fake Liquor that day.
——————————————————————
February 19 [unknown], Weather: Cloudy
..
Today, I suddenly learned of something that left me quite shocked.
I went on a business trip once before, to Hokkaido—yes, that was the time I didn't write in my Diary for several days in a row!
Today, I suddenly discovered (don't ask me how I found out, I'm not telling, hmph!) that one of the shareholders of the television station that invited me is actually Chris Wynyard.
The daughter of a legendary female star, a rising star in the film industry.
To be honest, she is truly beautiful. Although I don't particularly like him, I must say that she is much more attractive in person than in his photos—though, of course, that is just my personal opinion.
And—
[Manual Mute]
No wonder I always felt like people were looking at me strangely; it's so stifling.
By the way, she is truly, truly beautiful. Although I don't particularly like him, I have to admit that she is even more stunning in person than in his photos—well.. perhaps you might disagree; it's just my personal opinion.
Of course, besides this matter, there is also good news.
I met up with my former high school classmate!
He looks much more beautiful than she did in high school. That girl is a very serious and hardworking girl; unlike many other girls her age, she is so hardworking that it almost makes me feel ashamed.
Her grades had always been excellent, it was said that after high school, she went to Waseda University.
Reunited after many years, she looked much more mature now. Wearing light makeup, she accentuated his most beautiful features and used cosmetics to enhance his appearance, looking both capable and beautiful.
————————————————————————
February 20 [unknown], Weather: Cloudy to clear
..
I had a meal with my high school classmates and we exchanged updates on how our lives were going.
It was clear that she was doing quite well, at least better than most people.
his Boss values him, his colleagues are harmonious, she has a few close Friends. Her only regret is perhaps that she doesn't have a Boyfriend yet, she is always being pressured to marry by her Parents during every holiday.
But she herself didn't seem to care much, saying only that she felt happy. It was clear that she wasn't forcing herself; she truly felt that way.
"It is not easy to meet someone you truly love, who truly loves you in return; so if you really do, you must cherish them." — These were the words she said to me before we parted.
I smiled at her, indicating, of course.
Perhaps it's because I have lost too much in the past? I cherish everything I have now.
That's about all for the important matters today.
Oh, that's right, I remember I had the braised pork ribs and the seafood pasta. The home-style dishes at this restaurant are quite good, but the noodles were a bit overcooked.
Next time, you can bring a friend to try some of the other dishes.
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February 27, 20xx, Weather: Cloudy
..
Several more days passed in the blink of an eye.
Trying my best to write in my diary.
However, there really isn't much to write about QAQ
——————————————————————
February 28, 20xx, Weather: Overcast
..
Same as above.
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March 1, 20xx, Weather: Cloudy to clear
..
Similiar as above。
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March 2nd, Sunny
..
I find that I am becoming increasingly impatient with writing in my Diary QAQ
Although I had a premonition about this, I still wanted to struggle a little longer; at least two months have already passed, so if I can hold on, maybe I can make it to six months?
Regardless, after writing "as above" and "Similar as above," I decided I should write down today's daily life seriously.
—Actually, the main reason is that tomorrow is the Doll Festival.
When I was little, I was a girl who also loved the Doll Festival, but now I am already in my 20s. Although I seem to have endless youth, the dark circles and acne under my eyes have long since betrayed the fact that I frequently stay up late and run around all day.
Although I don't plan on celebrating Doll Festival myself, I really want Sister to experience this festival once.
When she was a child, she was victimized by things even she herself didn't know about, forced to grow up at a young age to bear burdens that she shouldn't have had to carry. Later, she even went through a near-death experience—literally—crossing the Sanzu River.
At least for now, I want to offer her a little compensation.
Although I shouldn't be the one doing this, I have no choice; after all, I am her only Family at this time.
Actually, I wanted to make a doll for her myself! But unfortunately, after asking Yaji to teach me sewing for the nth time, I finally decided to give up.
It is a complete tragedy where "the brain has grasped the steps, but the actual execution is entirely different from what was imagined."
—Simply put, his hands wouldn't obey him QAQ